Just What Did We Do Last Night? REVISION!
by Morrigan the Nightmare Queen
Summary: Disclaimer: I don't own FF10. Lulu wakes up in bed with a man . . . who is not Chappu or Wakka . . . and just happens to have blue hair . . . Lumour!


Lulu stretched. She yawned. Smiling contentedly, she cuddled back into the pair of strong arms wrapped around her torso. Damn, Chappu could really get wild when he wanted to, she thought dreamily. A strand of blue hair dangled into her face, and she flicked it away. What a night. Maybe-  
  
Wait.  
  
Chappu didn't have blue hair.  
  
And wasn't he dead?  
  
Frowning, Lulu turned over- and promptly screamed in shock.  
  
"Something wrong?" Maester Seymour Guado asked lazily, opening one deep purple eye.   
Lulu made a couple of incoherent choking sounds, then promptly fell out of bed.   
  
"Hey, are you alright?" Seymour asked, leaning over and reaching out to help up the raven-haired beauty who was now lying on the floor in an advanced state of shock. "Lu? What's the matter?"  
"I- I- I- erk." The Black Mage fainted.  
Seymour scratched his head. "Damn."  
  
It was all a nightmare. Just an alcohol-induced dream. Wait, alcohol doesn't do that kind of stuff. Maybe I took a drink from Auron's bottle. He's got all kinds of crazy shit in there. Yeah. That's it. I DID NOT SLEEP WITH SEYMOUR.  
"Lulu? Are you awake?"  
  
Damn.  
  
"Yeah- I think so." Lulu opened her eyes, trying to focus her hazy vision. The sight of the concerned, blue-haired figure hovering above her almost knocked her out again, but she forced herself to concentrate. "At least, I think I am. This does smack of 'bad dream.' Care to explain why the hell I ended up in bed with you?"  
  
Seymour sweatdropped. "Eh- I- well, it was- uh-"  
  
"I'm waiting." Lulu said, voice cold enough to give Shiva frostbite.  
  
The Guado looked sheepish. "Well, Yuna's got to work on her aim. As in, SERIOUSLY work on it.. She sent you, me, Whiny-Boy, and the one-armed guy to the Far Plane, and-"  
  
"WHAT?" Despite the fact that she still wasn't wearing anything, Lulu jumped up and stared at Seymour with wild eyes. If either of them had been wearing anything, she would have grabbed him by the collar. "I'm fucking DEAD?!"  
  
"'Fraid so." Seymour shrugged. "It's not so bad, though. It's just like the real world, really, except that nobody gives a shit about what you do or who you were. Auron got pissed off when he realized that none of these . . . uh . . . 'Cetras' walking around were gonna indict me for screwing up the world, but I cleaned his clock."  
  
"Alright." Lulu said through clenched teeth. "Fine. Beautiful. So why in HELL did I fucking SLEEP with YOU?!"  
  
"Calm down, I'm getting to that!" Seymour held up his hands defensively. "That's a bit of a weird story. I guess you took the transition badly, or something, because you started acting all weird. Started calling me Chappu and, well, I . . ." The sweatdrop doubled in size. "You had some, uh, ideas, and well, I, um . . ."  
  
Lulu's voice was flat. "Took advantage of my disorientation and screwed me."  
  
"Yeah, that's about right."  
  
Lulu facefaulted. "Wonderful. Marvellous. What are they going to say?"  
  
The Guado frowned. "Who? Your parents?"  
  
"Of course not, dumbfuck. My friends! Auron! Rikku! Wakka! Yuna! Tidus! Kimahri! The Aeons! They are so going to have my ass for this!"  
  
Seymour rolled his eyes. "Come on, Lu, lighten up! The only other person here is Auron- the whiny kid got sent back in time- and the already-dead-guy's too busy chatting up some winged chick named Siren. They're not even going to know."  
  
"'Zat so?" Lulu raised one eyebrow. "Dare I ask why you're taking the trouble to inform me of all this?"  
  
Seymour flushed bright red. "Welllllll . . ." he played with one blue strand of hair, struggling for the right words. "Dunno about you, but I kinda had fun last night. And I asked around, and that Chappu guy's going steady with some Cetra chick . . ." he let that hang.  
  
Frankly, Lulu didn't believe him. But as she glanced around the room- at the unmade bed, the Japanese-style screened walls, and the open window- she realized that the whole Far Plane probably knew about what had gone on last night. Chappu probably wouldn't be too interested in a Black Mage who had apparently slept with the first cute Guado that came along. Plus . . . she had to admit, Seymour was damn hot. And sex had never been that good on the mortal plane of existence.  
  
It only took a moment for Lulu to make up her mind. "I understand, hotshot," she purred, twining her arms around Seymour's shoulders. "And I'm sorry I worried you. Mind if I apologize . . . right now?"  
  
Seymour was quick on the uptake. "Not at all, beautiful," he replied, pulling her closer. A fiendish grin traced itself across his face. "As a matter of fact, I'll help . . . "  
  
  
Halfway across the Far Plane, Chappu emerged sleepily from the covers of his bed. Dawn was breaking. Beside him, Aerith Gainesborough stretched, worn out by the night's activities.  
"Aerith?" Chappu asked suddenly. "Did you hear something?"  
  
"No . . ." she shook her head. "Why, did you?"  
  
"Yeah." His brow furrowed. "Sounded like a plotline colla psing . . ." 


End file.
